Thoughts about life and death

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Not too long ago, one of my best friends lost her father. Today, one of my colleagues told me that they had lost a family friend, a young woman with a toddler passed away. It takes me back to my own losses, suddenly it feels like it recently happened. Once in a while I get this feeling, and it can trigger the dark thoughts in me: we can never keep anyone, we will eventually experience loss, and what is the purpose of this pain we all have to go through?

Luckily, it is only in my darkest moments these thoughts pervail. Life consists of so many wonderful things also. And I do believe that life consists in many ways of what we focus on. Some of you know well by now, that I try to focus every day on what I am thankful for. It makes my day look brighter, and outshines the small little details that otherwise could irritate the crap out of me:) Because, after all, things could be soo much worse, I am lucky in so many ways.

Once every now and then, like today, I need to reflect around life, the happiness and the ordeals, and I wonder what it is that gives meaning to all of this.

For many, having a faith, a higher meaning, can make it easier to endure hardship and feel support and love when needed. I don’t feel like I fit in a category called religion, but it does give me solace to think that there is a higher reason for all this, that is not yet revealed to me.

To know that the purpose of life is to experience love, is also a thought that gives me comfort. Not just to receive love, but to selflessly give! It might seem like a daunting task. As human beings we want to belong, and we are more or less scared of being abandoned or rejected. In my opinion, the highest love you can give, is to wish the best for the ones you love, even when their best choice is to reject you in one way or another.

It is not only the large questions in life that are important to give meaning, but also the little ones. For me, being able to spend time with people who give me energy, to solve a task or help someone, to experience something fun, to cry like a baby of a movie only to realize it was not my life, and then feel much better:)

I would love to hear about the things that give meaning for you, the thoughts and sets of belief that help you through the rough times!

Love,

S

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7 comments

  1. This too shall pass and nobody really dies anyway.

    Men vi savner dem og ønsker de var her og levde med oss -alikevel var vi heldige som hadde dem med oss så lenge som vi fikk ❤

  2. I’ve lost both my parents, most recently my Mum when my newborn was only a few weeks old. My little ones held me together through the hardest time in my life, little did they know that I think they saved my life. “This too shall pass” is a chain of words that I silently repeat over and over when times get tough.

    • My sincerest condolences. I am sure your children have been a great comfort in this time. Also, I doscovered how important daily routines are. Just do what you always do, just to keep yourself sane:)

      • That’s all you can do. Step by step. I’ve stopped thinking too far ahead because it was making me upset and anxious and all I’d do is think back to how much I need my parents, which isn’t great. I’ve also found that while I love to talk and nut out problems, my grief is very very private this time. We’re interesting creatures aren’t we?

      • We truly are. And we all react differently when loss hits us, I can see that on my own family. For me knowing that I was close to my brother, has helped me in this process….I do not struggle with a bad conscience that I should have been there more, like others do. Because I know I was. Perhaps you have found ways to express your grief without that much talking? Some find rituals very healing. Like placing flowers on the grave, making remembrance day doing the lost ones rituals, writing notes to put in balloons and release them. The imagination is the limit. So many things can be helpful, thankfully.

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